Long due update and nervous number 4

Hi Friends,
Sorry. Slack isn't even a word for what I am

I am writing again because baby things are happening. Early this month we transfered and yesterday we got a BFP. Of course that was after a fairly skinny positive, so as that is the way Thumper started out, I not sure if I am excited yet.

Going in for number 4 was surreal, and I feel pretty guilty. Even though Earl and I always wanted a stack of kids, it feels greedy and weird as a IF experiencer. We have 4 more embryos two which is an emotional roller-coaster. After two cesareans they won't recommend more than two more. So embryo adopting out might be in our future. I love the idea of helping someone in need, but it is very heart-breaking thinking of my babies being brought up by another family.

The kids are wonderful. C is curious a d a big talker. E is clever and cheeky. S is affectionate and hilarious.


Earl is going well, though he has his down days. He is such a fun Dad and loves starting to do things with the boys he loved as a kid. We are moving to a bigger house which is a relief.


I have a book idea related to my IF and pregnancy experience that I am quite excited about. One day I'll get there with it.

My heart grieves for those I know still struggling, IRL and on-line. I don't know understand why things are as they are :(

I am so grateful for this space. I re-read my earlier points when making notes for my book. I don't know how I would have survived without this space and the people it brought me.
Love LG