"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life" Proverbs 13:12

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Not my world

Sometimes I think the Internet is not good for me.

Today I opened a blog post of a friend celebrating a year since since found out she was pregnant with her second child.

It was a lesson in what life is like in the world of the fertile. So different from my world.

She isn't sure if she's pregnant and decides to pee on a stick.

Not my world

She wasn't trying to get pregnant and isn't sure how she feels about it.

Not my world

She finds out that she is and is excited.

Well, it was my world once but even then there was a fear that just doesn't seem to fit into the "normal" experience. And in the end the fear was justified :'(

She is worried about telling her friend who is also trying for her second, but finds out they are both conveniently pregnant, found out at the same time, and are now expecting their kids at the same time.

In my world i watch my friends move onto their second 'successful' (sorry, bad word I know)pregnancies, and babies births. And nothing works out conveniently for me.

She now writes excitedly as she looks at her baby beside her.

Not my world.

I HATE MY WORLD!!!!!!!!!


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