"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life" Proverbs 13:12

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

I'm NOT pregnant, please keep reading my blog!

Today could have been a really lovely day. It was farewell from a very special job I'v been doing. And it was a really lovely day today whenever I was busy. And yet when I had a moment to myself I just couldn't help feeling in despaired. I really, really, really thought I was pregnant. And I'm not. It's just so overwhelmingly unfair.

You hear all those lovely stories about how "I really hoped and prayed I'd have a baby before Christmas" or, "Exactly a year after loosing by baby I was pregnant again" and it comes true. I thought I was going to be one of those lovely stories but I am not. I am never a lovely story. I am that never successful, always awful- 'person you never want to be' stories. All the things I've dreaded, Christmas, the day we lost Thumper, my SIL Pregnancy, My BFFs pregnancy, they are all happening with no baby and its too hard.

I read other blogs about people who are nine weeks, exactly where I was when I lost Thumper.


And I'm a bit worried that some people have stopped reading my blog because they think I'm pregnant. I'm not, please come back! I need your support through all this!



  1. I haven't stopped!!! I'm still here!! I haven't been online a ton lately b/c of work and craziness. I'm so sorry, LG!! I know you miss Thumper so much. I wish it were so different for you!!! It is unfair - completely, totally, and in all other ways UNfair!!!! But, remember that what is now is not destined to always be!!! And even if your story has been awful so far, YOU are lovely!!! Lovely!!! HUGS!!!

  2. Still here, pregnant or not. I'm so sorry you are having such a difficult time. It just really isn't fair.

  3. I'm still here, I've mostly been a stalker just because I've stopped blogging myself, but I'm still reading! We've been trying for 3 years with one loss in there and everyone around me is pregnant too, I totally get the feeling! I'm sorry things are tough and even if I'm not commenting, I'm thinking of you!

  4. I'm here!! And will stay here WHEN you get pregnant.