I know I am not the merriest person in the world.
It's been a hard year. This time last year was really, really hard, and the hardness was just beginning.
But this year, as I get ready to celebrate the birth of my saviour- I am ready to be merry. Not because I know that things will all work out like I hope. Not because there is anything new to celebrate this year, my arms are still empty.
But my life is full of many things: Awesome family, a beautiful supportive husband, food and shelter and a life with purpose.
And because of the first Christmas, I have Jesus. So I am ready for a Merry Christmas.
Today I feel that. Two days ago I did not. That is the nature of this ride. The big thing is not to feel guilty when things are hard, and to do your best with the good times.
So whether this Christmas is Merry or very, very sad- you are in my prayers.