"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life" Proverbs 13:12

Wednesday, August 24, 2011


I feeling so lost.

Been feeling like vomiting but had the tiniest bit of spotting. Freaking out about the results later today. And I have so much to do today, so much pretending to be happy and perfectly fine, as if my world is not potentially about to be smashed.

Honestly, I don't know how I'm going to get through this day.

And whatever happens, tonight is a bucks party Earl is organising, followed by a wedding where he is the best man, followed by birthday celebrations with his sister which will, rightly, be all about the good news of our nephew, and very baby centric. Where we will have to hold it together and not just be okay but happy.


I asked the nurse who took my bloods, "what shall we aim for?". She smiled and said, "Let's go for 500, why not?".

So that's my aim. 500 beta.

She always manages to make me smile even on days like this.
Small mercies.

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