Friday it is. We will find out after 3pm what time, but we have the day, I have the ultra complicated adding powder to liquid injection to do, and then we have lift off. The doctor and the nurse are happy with the numbers and size, they seem smaller and less than I remember there should be, so I am a bit lost at how to think. The nurse seemed surprised that i should be worried. Doc thinks there are four good ones, and we might get some of the smaller ones if we are lucky.
Anyway, happy/sad result was not about the scan but about the biopsy and my blood results. Doc says I have (and this is a direct quote) "A text book uterus". Everything was doing exactly what it was suppose to be doing. Doc is ready (as much as you can know in this business) to rule out any Uterus problems.
He then went onto say that it is probably Embryo issues.
Hard to hear just before a cycle.
Of course, the first step in a solution to embryo problems is to change around the stimulation, which is what we are doing. So in some senses I should be happy about that. But I guess I was hoping that there might be an easy fix solution to our problems in time for this cycle, and that is unlikely to be the case.
But this news also throws wide open the Embryo Adoption option.
And even though we would love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love (I won't keep writing it, but you get the idea) for this to work right now, and to get our little half Lady/Earl baby, the idea that there might be an alternative if this doesn't work is a wonderful relief.
Earl was saying, people always talk about babies being "blood of my blood". He said the thing that really appeals about EA is that the baby will share my blood in the womb. That is a really nice image. I think he's a little sad at the prospect of the baby not sharing his blood, but not sad enough not to want to do it.
So here we are. Trying again. Praying for our miraculous cycle. But feeling like babies are likely to be in our future, whatever the outcome.
PS Funeral is day before transfer, on my rest day. So all in all a very emotion packed week.