"Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life" Proverbs 13:12

Saturday, May 21, 2011

1 day and hope retreating

1 day until beta.

I have had the slightest touch of dark, old bleeding.

I am not totally without hope, but it feels like the kind of thing that is the warning of a bad day tomorrow. I'm praying like crazy, but I'm so sad, and trying to leave a bit of the emotions for tomorrow. There is still the possibility that everything is going to be good. But there is the real possibility of a big, fat, ugly negative and I am struggling.

I'm fighting off sickness so I am feeling tired and warn out as well.

Where the hell is my miracle?

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